you pay 'em for what they know

Once again, I've had an $85 lesson in plumbing. . . for fifteen minutes of the plumber's time spent wrapping a "ratty looking piece of string" (my wife's description) around the threads of the pipe I was trying to install, then adding some joint compound to make a leakproof connection. Part of that time was spent writing out the bill.

I have a great idea for a book. All of us home handy-man types should get together and compare notes about similar lessons learned from plumbers. We could charge what it's cost us to learn those secrets - about $85 per page should do it. Would they get after us for giving away trade secrets? Do the plumbers have carefully guarded secrets like the Masons? Was there a plumbers guild back when the Masons were getting organized?

My favorite lesson so far is how to unclog a stopped-up drain after somebody (not to mention any names) ran too many potato peelings through the garbage disposer. I couldn't reach the clog with the "snake" so I called a plumber. His solution: Use MY ladder to get up on the roof so he could run MY garden hose down the vent pipe that comes up through the roof, then have ME turn MY water on so he could jam MY garden hose up and down, breaking up the potato peelings. That was cheaper than 85 bucks but this was years ago when everything was relatively cheap.

This time, at least the plumber had to provide his own string. (I haven't looked to see if he included the cost of string in the bill.) I am not sure whether he used his own joint compound or the tube I had sitting out on the bathroom counter. But at least the danged thing is installed, operational, and leak-free.